Body Language, keeping your distance.

Ever wonder why, when a stranger gets a little to close we feel slightly uncomfortable. Ever wonder why, in elevators, people always try to head for the perimeter? This is largely due to socially acceptable distances. In our culture, we tend to keep a distance from those we do not know. As they relationship changes and those people become closer to us, that distance can also change. The distance changes according to the degree of intimacy of the relationship.

When we are in public, generally we try to keep between 10 and 12 feet between us and other members of the public. Of course there are times when this is not possible, but those times are usually a bit stressful and tense for all involved. We do this out of a sense of safety. When strangers are between 10 and 12 feet away, they are much less capable of causing us harm. If they should try, we are in a good position to get away.

As things get more social, then the distances start to reduce. The so called social zone is usually between 4-10 feet. People at parties usually keep this distance until they get to know each other further. People also sitting in chairs or gathered in a room together will also tend to keep this distance. This distance provides for a chance to communicate without becoming to intimate. It also provides for an escape opportunity if this other person is someone you don’t wish to know further.

Next is the personal zone. This is usually conducted at a distance of 2-4 feet. This is usually done with fewer people on a more intimate occasion. It provides the perfect opportunity for two people to have a conversation. It can be expanded to include more but gets difficult with more than 4 participants.

Finally, there is the intimate zone. This is usually between 2 and 0 feet. Generally people remain within an arms length of each other. People who participate in this form of distance are usually acquainted on a very personal level. Most couples and partners have achieved this level of social distance an intimacy/

Knowing social distances can be very important. Those from other counties that have different ideas about distances often find themselves in trouble when they come to the west. They find out, many times the hard way that invading someone’s personal space can be perceived as a threat. Many times this brings mixed results. Keep in mind the social distances in your current situation. It may save you a lot of embarrassment.